Angelator! (HEY ya?)

2006-05-25T13:38:00.000-04:00

In other news... the Sabres are 2 wins away from the finals. (Yes that is the way I look at it) This looks like it may be a relatively tough series though! I suppose that is something to look forward to.

2006-05-25T13:23:00.000-04:00

Oh boy, I feel a mood comming on. I have gone to work dressed all in black two times this week, and damn it felt good. I'm just waiting for someone to comment (I'm jes waitin' on a nigga ta push me...) I have the urge to fly away. Like up and quit my job and kidnap a highschool student to do my bidding and fly away in the blue-but-should-be-black JETTA. I am getting tired of this chirade. WHEW. And now that I think about it, I have had enough of highschool students, so perhaps I will have to do my own bidding afterall... I think I am going to have to start taking my dogs for 5 mile walks and pray I have enough money to make it through the summer. I keep envisioning Ryan swooping in and rescuing me, wearing one of his crazy rysithagoth outfits, shocking everyone we pass as we exit the building...Hmm Ryan if you are reading this, what do you think? Wanna rescue me? Actually that is exactly what I need. A blunt and a good long walk with Ryan. Something tells me that won't be happening any time soon. I'd like to write more but it is almost time for the "Ascension Mass" liturgy. Why am I so anxious?

2006-05-10T13:36:00.000-04:00

Here I sit at work, pretty much just waiting for something to happen. It is sort of a slow day. I am seeing people but sort of sporadically so time isn’t exactly flying by.

Attention Sabres Stalkers: GAME THREE IS TONIGHT, and I just can’t wait! I couldn’t watch game two because locally they decided to show the Carolina series instead. Poo! I tried to watch it but I found that I just didn’t care. I hope tonight’s game is on television. I could check but I don’t want to be pissed all day if it won’t be on. Don’t ask me what kind of logic that is because I don’t pretend to know.

I really need new sneakers and some fans for my apt. Sneakers because my old ones are really stretched out, and fans because even when it’s 60 degrees outside the heat is on in my building. Maybe I’ll splurge and get an air conditioner. I wonder if there is a store (other than Walmart) where I could get all of these items. God I hate shopping and running all over the place.

God what a boring fucking blog this has turned out to be. I used to be cool. Someone slap me!

2006-05-09T12:14:00.000-04:00

LET’S GO BUFFALO! Ok, for the record I no longer live in Buffalo, however the Sabres mean as much to me as they ever did. Although I can only watch like 40% of the games here in Syracuse I have been following them closely. I was even thinking of driving to Canada to watch on CBC when they aren’t televised here. If the Sabres set themselves up to sweep Ottawa I just might. Oh and yes, I realize that I was wrong about my hockey predictions. I have no excuse really… I never thought we’d face Ottawa in the second round! As of now we are up 2-0 on the series. I am really pleased but scared too in a way. I know we are going to face them at home for the next two games and that most people would say that our record so far this series, along with home ice advantage all but sews up a victory. You can’t however, count Ottawa out yet. I would be shocked if they didn’t win at least one game! Then again we have a really good record against them in the playoffs… Now I’m just rambling.

I have been writing pretty regularly lately, which is a good thing. I think I may finally be onto something. Either that or I’m totally loosing it, both of which are equally possible. Has anyone noticed how it is amazingly difficult to fulfill your dreams? Sometimes I am sick of working toward my goals. What I mean is, isn’t it about time I succeeded already?

I really want to go camping. I need some fresh air and fire light.

I have lunch duty now, so I must go. Let me leave you by saying flip ‘em the bird, the peace bird. More to come on that later…

2006-04-24T08:37:00.000-04:00

Well the regular season is over and the race is on for the STANLEY CUP. I can’t say that I am as excited as I would have been when I was a kid, but I am still really looking forward to it. It may have something to do with having no friends. (Having no friends is kind of liberating…but I digress.) Is anyone interested in my Buffalo Sabres Hockey predictions for the playoffs? If I can’t see the games out here I’ll be really sad! Ok in a nutshell, here we go: I think the Sabres will take Philly in 5 relatively easy games, (all we have to do is contain Peter Forsberg and they will go down hill fast) then they’ll beat the devils in seven games and sweep the Hurricanes before an intense third round with the Senators, that series will also go 7 games. Buffalo may or may not be able to beat the Senators… I think it depends on whether or not Hasek is, a) on the ice b) playing like we know he can play. If Dominik Hasek is healthy and ‘on his game,’ there is no beating him. Even if he is a little rusty in the beginning, we wont face him on the ice for a month, which is really plenty of time to loosen up. I can’t imagine how it will feel if the Sabres make it all the way to the finals. It would be just my luck, since this is my first time living out of the city for more than six or eight weeks, that the Sabres would go all the way. I can just see myself now driving back to Syracuse at 2 am all tired and stupid after a game so I can work the next day.

I forgot to post this on Friday, and let me say that although the Sabres won the game on Saturday, I a quite disappointed because for some reason the game was blacked out in Syracuse!!! WTF?? It was on the TV schedule but when I tuned in all pumped up for the game (dinner ready, lucky pj’s, etc.) there was some sort of old time hockey special playing with a message scrolling across the bottom of the screen saying that the game wasn’t going to be seen in this area. I called the cable company but they couldn’t tell me why. RATS! What if I can’t watch any of the games. I’m so sad!

Not too sad for a shopping spree, however. This weekend I bought 1) a new queen sized pillow top bed, 2) a new bright red comfy love seat, and 3) a new black chaise lounge. Note that I said ‘new’ not ‘good-will’ or ‘someone gave it to me.’ God I love having a real job. The bed was delivered on Saturday. The rest will be coming in the next few weeks. I can’t wait! My apartment almost looks like home! Funny story about buying the bed… I looked online for discount mattress stores on Friday. I found a few, and on Sat. got up early and happily went looking for a new bed. The first place I went was a factory direct place. It was kind of big and creepy but I went in anyway. There was a sign that said 'mattress showroom at end of dock.’ I followed the arrow and came across some guys smoking cigarettes. They said ‘Hi’ and I said ‘hi’ and, pointing toward the end of the dock, I asked ‘are they in there?' They said ‘yeah go right on in.’ So I did. It was kind of cold and dark and really cluttered and messy. I was surprised at the loud rock music playing somewhere in the back. I saw a few people walking around in workshop type clothes and lots of materials for mattress-making stacked up at stations on the floor. There were big staplers hanging from the ceiling etc. I thought, hmm factory direct is definitely the right thing to call this. I turned the corner and there were a few beds lined up near a desk. I started trying them out. There were workers walking around, and they definitely saw me, but no one said anything. While I was laying on one of the beds wondering when someone was going to come out and try to sell me a bed, I noticed a sign on the desk that had the store hours on it. It said they were closed on Saturday. I jumped up and looked around. No wonder no one came over to help me. They were trying to figure out what the hell I was doing there. I definately saw more than one guy walk by and give me a sideways glance. I got the hell out of there. I passed by the same guys smoking cigarettes on the way out. They said ‘did you find him?’ I said ‘yes,’ as I walked quickly past them, smiling but totally embarrassed. They must have thought I was looking for a person, not a mattress. I can’t believe I didn’t notice any of the clues that the store was closed. I can’t believe I was lying on a bed in a closed-for-the-weekend, dark factory and no one yelled at me. Stoner moment.

2006-04-20T20:05:00.000-04:00

Happpppppyyyy 420.

2006-04-06T18:03:00.000-04:00

I guess you know you are a total stoner when someone points out, that on a particular playlist you are listening to on your ipod stereo, you have the same Beatles song like five times. Not five different versions or anything, just the same song five times, and you are totally shocked, because you work out to that playlist every day, and you never noticed... I mean what can you say except 'oh that one is my favorite!' Rediculous.

2006-04-03T14:59:00.000-04:00

Happy April. Did anyone have any good jokes played on them this year? Or perhaps you played one yourself? My Gramma called me at like 9am and told me the war was over and the troops were coming home within 6 months. I didn’t buy it but I played along because I love my gram, and because it was a good joke. If I had any faith in the government at all I might have believed her. Unfortunately I think that old “W” is going down in flames and taking us all with him, thus we will be at war until he is out of office even if the troops do come home, which they will not…at least right now. By the way, can someone tell me how that man got elected for a second term? I mean we all know how he got to be president the first time around, and yes, the taste in my mouth is just as bitter, but really, who voted for this guy? I’m sorry I can’t help but bash the president whenever I get the chance.

I got to go to a ‘Syracuse staple’ restaurant yesterday with July. It was called Luigi’s. The food was pretty good. The place reminded me of Italian Village or something else on the west side of Buffalo. It was good to have July here, if only for one day, because she knows this area really well and was able to show me some stuff. I think I am getting used to this place. It is a little more rural in Syracuse than I had imagined. There are lots of trees and nature just minutes outside the city. It is really pretty and I love it but my allergies do not. There are pine trees outside my bedroom window. They smell lovely, but are committing body-system genocide on me. My eyes are watering and I’m sneezing a lot. I look crazy I’m sure. I have been blowing my nose like Louis Armstrong during band practice. People are starting to give me that ‘why are you in front of me with those germs’ look. Ah well, I think it is time for me to go buy some Benedryl.

2006-03-31T09:14:00.000-05:00

You know, I don't wanna call myself a psychic, but there was an earthquake in Iran yesterday AND a cruise ship sank in the same general area of the world. Before you roll your eyes let me just say that a) my mother had the same feeling I did... she called me to see if I was ok yesterday evening, then she called everyone else she knew and couldn't find anything wrong. And B) I have a similar feelings whenever bad disasters happen (in the family and in the world.) For example, the day the tsunami hit in se asia I was watching a movie with my family and began to get really anxious. I got up and went to the bathroom. Something overtook me. I thougth I was going to vomit, I didn't but out of nowhere I began sobbing like crazy. I am not a person who cries a lot! I couldn't control myself. I felt like I was drowning, or rather like I was caught up in the serf at the beach, I could not catch my breath. I could feel the waves hitting me. The main feeling I can remember is grief, not terror, but imense sadness. I thougt I was loosing it for maybe 10-15 minutes and then I just calmed down, washed my face and went back out and finished watching the movie. I was still anxious but the ordeal was over. I thougt what had happened was odd but really didn't give it much thought at all right after it happened. The next day I heard that 50,000 people had died in a flood/tsunami. I couldn't believe it. When the final death count turned out to be over 250,000 I just figured that some sensative person had to feel that happening. I can just imagine the prayers that were going out, the fear being projected, the utter energy. I'm sure I'm not the only one who felt it. I'm sure I'll feel it again.

2006-03-30T08:48:00.000-05:00

I am totally freaking out right now. I cant really put my finger on why. It has been building for a few days. I keep feeling like something bad is going to happen, or is happening. I keep having the urge to write a memorial service, but I can’t figure out for whom. I have been having weird chaotic dreams. I dreamed about my mother when she was really young last night and the night before. Her hair was still long. She had gray streaks in it but it was mostly brown and curly. I got a sense however, that it wasn’t my mother I was seeing but me because she doesn’t have curly hair, I do. That does not make any sense but I have to write it down. I was anxious in my sleep. Hard to understand how I could be so anxious and still go to sleep… I also dreamed about a boy I knew in high school that died. I really loved that boy. I think about him from time to time, but haven’t dreamed of him since probably 1996 right after he died. He used to haunt me but he’s been gone for years. I was really surprised to dream of him. I dreamed of pictures of him, not him talking to me. Pictures with writing on them, messages I can’t remember. I was never really sure how he died. It had something to do with drugs but everyone was really hush-hush about it. I couldn’t come right out and ask. If I had the chance now I would though. I always wondered if he had killed himself—perhaps accidentally, or if that had even been called into question. He was really unhappy. I checked the obituaries this morning to see if anyone I know has died. If they have, it isn’t in the paper yet. The ten-year anniversary of his death is coming up in a few weeks. Ten years. It is just so fucking sad. Especially when you realize that usually after high school, life gets a lot better. Now I’m just ranting. I think I’m starting to feel better.

2006-03-25T22:43:00.000-05:00

I finally got myself a new computer. I LOVE it. I mac G4. The entire thing is like 2 inches thick. My favorite feature so far has been the 'photo booth.' I never knew how much fun it could be to take pictures of myself. In celebration of bringing the internet into my house for the first time in the month that I've been here, I took the opportunity to buy some music that I have been wanting for ages... Dont tell anyone but I definately got Kenny Rogers greatest hits-- the last time I heard that record was probably in my mothers kitchen when I was a really little kid. She had a little tape player she listened to when she was washing dishes or cooking. I loved that tape... I listened to it all the time. It is about time I heard it again.
Speaking of my family, I think they are pissed at me. I guess I was supposed to go to home for my mother's birthday dinner, and then I wasnt, and then I was again. Somehow I got lost in the back and fourth and when I finally called to she what was going on, it was too late for me to get there in time. Hopefully they went without me, it would be really stupid to not go just because I wasnt able to get there. I'm sure everyone else was ready and excited to be getting together.
That aside, I'm not exactly sure why we all had to get together this weekend anyway. Let me vent for a minute... I'm comming home the next two weekends to get my dog neutered and for easter. Each trip costs me like 6 hours driving time and $40 for gas and tolls. Plus my engine light is on. None of these reasons made any sense to anyone but me, or so it seemed, I really hope this isnt going turn into some big thing where I have to go home whenever they say so to keep people happy with me. I mean I want to go home, and often, because I miss my family as much as they miss me... but driving home three times in three weeks with my engine light on is stupid. It isnt like we are all freaked out about birthdays in my family. This paragraph makes me sound really horrible and ungreatful. I'm not at all. Just frustrated and, ok, a little stoned.

2006-03-21T12:38:00.000-05:00

Walmart update: Fuck UPS. Seriously. Unless I'm at home I can't get my packages. They can't deliver to a neighbor, they can't just leave the stuff there, I simply can't have my things unless I sign for them. They wont change the delivery date or time and that is that. What if I dont get my walmart coffee table and area rug? What am I supposed to do, call in sick to get my UPS delivery, I considered it, briefly, this morning, but seriously why is this such a big deal. I tried leaving a signed note and the UPS man got all huffy and underlined all crazy on the UPS posty-note that I had to be there IN PERSON. There is no way I'm going to a)find the ups loading docks to pick the stuff up myself b)lug a coffeetable,headboard and area rug up to the third floor from the street (that is why I wanted it delivered in the first place right?)Ah well I must get back to work so hopefully this message is coherant cause I'm not re reading it.

2006-03-17T14:54:00.000-05:00

Well, I finally got paid, so after work today I’m going to go shopping. I’m usually not much of a shopper but I am feeling inspired. I ordered a bunch of things from Walmart.com the other day and I think that is what got the ball rolling, the big white-trashy ball that is. I know Wal-mart isn’t the most posh place you can go for home furnishings, but it’s among the cheapest, so it is what it is, I guess. Actually, I officially hate Wal-mart, usually I boycott it at all costs, but for whatever reason I have amended my moratorium this month. Perhaps you think that makes me a hypocrite, perhaps you are right.
My office is so cold that I am pretty sure I’m going to lapse into hypothermia at some point. If they find me blue and mumbling, frozen to my computer chair, fret not, if you are reading this: know that I love you and please, remember the good times. Things have been pretty, pretty, pretty slow here at my new job. Next week should be different, or so they tell me. Who knew surfing the internet all day and getting paid would loose it’s luster in a mere two weeks. Maybe if it weren’t 14 degrees f. with a wind chill of 9 coming in from my skylight. Luckily leaking air doesn’t mean leaking rain, although I’m not sure how this drafty thing doesn’t let in the water/snow.

2006-03-14T15:08:00.000-05:00

I spent most of my day today writing a packet of information on bullies and bullying. Very interesting stuff, I’ll tell you (…bullies sometimes hit, kick, or push to hurt people.) Thank God for the Internet. I read like 8 articles and condensed them into 4 junior high friendly pages in just over half a day. Who knows how long that would have taken me other wise.

Oh, who wants to wager a guess as to how many times I got pulled over on my way home from Buffalo on Sunday? Once? NO. Twice? Yep. Stupid State Police want me to have two headlights for some reason. Now today I have to go somewhere and get it replaced so I don’t get a ticket for real, actually I think I was supposed to do it by sundown yesterday but er, I bought the bulb and then didn’t want to break the glass putting it in during the thunderstorm we were having. After work, in 20 minutes I am going to go to the dealer and make someone show me how. Anyone who knows how my dogs react to strangers understands why I wouldn’t even want to get pulled over once with them in the car, let alone twice. Horrifying. Ok it could have been worse…they could have been uncrated and actually bit the trooper. It was noisy, that’s all I have to say. I wish I could have barked those cops myself… especially the second one, I mean damn what are the odds of getting pulled over twice in the fog and rain in the dark with one headlight?

If I left some cream-sauce-pasta-n-veggies in my car overnight and all day at work, can I still eat it if it was like 45-50 degrees outside and still smells fine? Hopefully I can, cause I already did. Perhaps you’ll see a possible update on that front later. We can’t waste food from our grammas can we?

2006-03-13T09:08:00.000-05:00

So lately I have had to deal with a lot of changes in my life. New job, new 'hometown.' Welcome as some of these changes were, it doesn’t mean they were totally easy. I love my new apartment! It is truly wonderful to have some space and time to myself, not to mention the only ones I have to clean up after are myself, and the dogs. The biggest mess they ever make is knocking over a garbage can or something so I don’t have much to worry about. I now live in a city that is even smaller and shittier than Buffalo. I never thought I’d move away from Buffalo and my friends and family for a step down, but ta-da, here I am. I’m sure I’ll have some fun but so far I haven’t found much to do but shop, and since I haven’t worked in a month I haven’t been paid in a month, so I am really broke! I think I have $34 in my savings and maybe $55 in my checking. A mere 3 months ago I literally had $10,000 in savings, but then I paid off my credit cards (mostly) and paid my first months rent and a $700 security deposit so, yeah, I’m broke as a joke, to use a much over used euphemism. I hate having no money. (Insert mushy music here:) I grew up so poor that I promised myself that I would never let that happen to me and my kids. I knew that when I grew up I would a) never have a baby before I was financially sound, and b) save, save, save and be smart about investing. I decided all this when I was perhaps 11 years old. I have been saving ever since. Maybe it is good for me to see what it is like to be financially vulnerable. I don’t like it—not even for two weeks. I have literally never borrowed money from my mother that I didn’t pay back in a week. I bought all my own books in college (and some of my sisters too sometimes…) I like being independent and financially sound. I don’t like being stressed out, I don’t like having to think and think before I buy stuff.
I am still looking forward to moving to Los Angeles and being ‘famous,’ but in all honesty if I don’t stay here for at least the rest of this school year and next year, I can’t even put this job on a resume. I think I will feel better once I know my way around and such. Not to say that I am feeling bad, I am quite enjoying myself for the time being, but after 2 weeks or so I am already getting kinda bored, so I can only imagine what is coming in that department. I sort of feel like one of those assholes that comes from “the city” to go to school at UB and tells anyone who will listen how much Buffalo sucks. Syracuse isn’t that bad, it just isn’t spectacular and thus, since it also isn’t home I’m not that enthusiastic about living here for 18 months. My apartment complex does have a pool though, so perhaps that will be Syracuse’s saving grace in my book.
Perhaps solitary Angela will even have to go out on a limb and make a few friends or gasp, start dating someone. I think I hate dating because I hate considering other peoples feelings. That sounds really bad, but I suppose I don’t mean it like it sounds… I just want to do what I want to do, when I want to do it, and I don’t like considering what does or doesn’t work in that equation for anyone other than me. I am not selfish, really, just not into working at relationships. I have to find a good-looking retard I can control… just kidding. I hate retards. Just kidding, I love retards, just not like that. I am finding, however, that I no longer am content with hooking up so eventually something will have to change. I really don’t want to get AIDS. That is the lingering reason. The up front reason is that it is no longer satisfying. I need to kick someone’s ass around the bedroom for a few months for a change, instead of, you know, once, and see how that goes. God, I hate to say it but the Dominatrix thing isn’t even that interesting lately. Maybe it is because I’m a goddamn guidance counselor?

2006-01-17T18:50:00.000-05:00

I almost stole a childs chiuaua yesterday. I was driving to work, already on schedule to be 5 minutes late, when I saw a naked collar-less chiuaua running down the street. It was like 20 degrees outside or less that day and I was worried that the dog would freeze to death. I was sure he had gotten loose from his house and would soon be a goner. I turned around and followed him. I stopped the car and called him... he started to trot over and I heard a really scared 7 or 8 year old yell nervously: MOMMY! Apparently the dog was just not too well cared for (outside with no sweater or collar...) and they were just letting him out to pee. Had I not stopped right in front of the house where the dog lived he would have spent the better part of the day in the back room at starbucks in university plaza and then probably moved in with me or had to go to the spca... you should have seen the kids face as I slammed shut the door to the jetta and busted a move up on out of there... I angelator, was almost a dognapper. That kid had nightmares about me I'm sure.

2005-12-31T19:29:00.000-05:00

Well I guess this is the last post for the year. Hopefully we face only good things in the year to come. I have a really good feeling about 2006, like I have been anticipating it my whole life. Big things are going to happen. Changes. It should be a lot of fun.

2005-12-05T21:54:00.000-05:00

Why the fuck is the post from october 10th so important that it keeps staying at the top of my blog... it wont go away.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BISON! Not that you bother to read this, busy as you are with your nerdy newsgroups. 22 is pretty, pretty, pretty, old. Hope you like your present.

2005-12-04T18:59:00.000-05:00

I am getting worried.
worried that we are stalling...
that or somehow we are off in some
other direction I'm not allowed to know about yet.

when they gets overconfident or nervous they gets
NASTY so I cant say much unless
I feel like fighting. and I dont.

hopefully we are not headed for finely
crafted disaster
I am not going to deal with people taking me
lightly
or trying to sabbotage me
I am not going to take no for an answer
I will not be pushed out or schlepped to the side

2005-11-26T20:37:00.000-05:00

Blogging is hard work, that is why I was really upset to look at my page the other day and see that my latest post never actually posted. I will try to recap what I had originally written like a week ago but I dont know why I should even bother, the joy for that post is gone...

Last week we started filming the movie. I think I look kinda fat on screen but just so you know (you can use this information when you watch the movie) I am fucking georgeous in real life. You heard it here first-- Angelator is a hottie. (wink) Dont believe me? Listen to this: The other day a man in a black on black on black mercedes walked into my store. I was quite taken aback with the man as he was the most thugged out thing I have, seen since I ran into DMX at Fridays resturaunt in downtown Buffalo while he was here awaiting trial for smoking weed and trying to steal a police horse or something. He was hood-beautiful. Gold glasses and all. He said to me "you are beautiful." I did not reply but for some reason I was mighitly attracted and taken WAY off guard. I think it was image of introducing this guy to my mafioso-ish uncles in a few months that made me decide to just say nothing. He then said "I guess I should have gone to McDonalds" AND I couldn't help myself. I gave him a smile I reserve for gangsters and those types of men that are not easily swept off their feet by a girl in an apron. I made him a drink. My co-worker Leah came back behind the counter from where ever she was. I coughed. She make some sort of comment about my quitting smoking. I said "sure as soon as I get pregnant," to which the guy replies, "we can get started on that tonignt." I walked over and set the drink down in front of him. He says "please do me a favor and call me tonignt" and proceded to pull out a lottery ticket and write his phone number on it for me. I dont think I am going to call him-- I think it is the lottery ticket.

I talked to someone this week that I haven't talked to in a while. Someone I thought I'd never really talk to again. It made me realize that not knowing this person anymore is unacceptable.

2005-11-11T20:29:00.000-05:00

Ok, for real this time, we beging filming our movie tomorrow. I'm getting nervous. I always look even fatter on fucking home videos, and considering the fact that we are recording on a cheap camera I dont think I'm gonna look that great... although I am the most gorgeous person you have ever seen in person (wink, wink). Dont believe me? Listen to this story. The other night the most thugged out man I have ever seen came into work. If you know anyting about my neighborhood you understand the depth of that statement. He was driving a black on black on black Mercedes. I didnt know they even made tints that dark... I immediately zeroed in on him as he walked in the door, I decided to play it cool. As I rang him out he told me I was georgeous. I pretended I didnt hear him (*guess I was nervous) and he said 'oh I guess I should have gone to McDonalds' I couldn't help myself any longer. I gave him my sexy look and smiled, saying nothing. I stepped over to make my drink. My co worker came back from whereever she was. I coughed a bit. She said something about my quitting smoking. I said oh sure as soon as I get pregnant. Loud enough for us both and anyone else around us to hear he said he and I 'could work on that tonight' if I wanted. (I wanted)Still I played it cool. I walked over and handed him his drink. He then said something about my calling him anytime of the day or night and proceded to write his phone number on a lotter ticket for me.. .I gave him a real piece of paper to write on and put his number in my pocket. He then said the dirtiest sexiest thing I have ever heard in my life that included the words hard hot and wet and then he reminded me of his mustache. JESUS GOD! Dont believe me? Ask Leah. I didnt call him. I think it was the lottery ticket. No...Maybe it was my shaking hands and my fear that I wold let this guy have whatever he wanted.

2005-10-11T22:47:00.000-04:00

I have been reading my posts for the past few months and I realized that none of my pictures show up anymore since the site I had them registered with I no longer pay for, this really sucks, sorry for any inconvenience but I will not be going back and putting them all in again, it is just too much work. So basically if you want to see pictures of my dogs or me stoned just ask to see them in person...

2005-10-09T16:05:00.000-04:00

Before it gets too late--
for all of us.

Forget the other flavors
all that's left is
bitter.

It is happening.
before our eyes
but we cant discern it.
can we stop this?
I admit I dont see clearly
but still know what is near.

feel.

no matter how
bright you are
only god can save you.

it's Pandemic
it's shattering

Pay attention they say,
but to what,
mudslides and rain
make for bad conversation.

No matter, we'll all get
whats
coming.

2005-10-06T23:12:00.000-04:00

Where do you suppose she goes?

a friend sometimes has to
force herself
It could have been
me
but it wasnt me
Who knows why
guess
I'm lucky
Not doomed but
destined
for fun
and big things
and social responsibility
and fleas
and trying to stay normal
No one can believe it
Once we were trippin
and now things are dying
and the road is forking
and I know which way
I'm going
and for once
Im not sorry

2005-10-02T20:43:00.000-04:00

Woa has it been a while since I have blogged. I still haven't fixed the posting of my tattoo pictures...

Lots of stuff is going on! The house deal fell through because it turned out to need a $30,000 roof, which sucks-- but I'm glad I found out it had issues before I bought it.

I did get a new car however. a Jetta! I love it. I dont love the timing of the grand am shitting out, but whatever, there really isnt anything bad about a new car (ok it is a 2003 but still at least it was made in this decade.) Baby Bison, Ryonce and myself have been doing a lot of writing and we are almost done with the script for a movie. Eat your heart out non-believers, it is a winner and it is going to go someplace or at the very least be the launch pad for going someplace. I am so excited!

I have been taking classes at ECC (erie community college)(stop laughing) including the film class with the ALTERNATE HISTORIANS, our very funny troupe, and a weight lifting class with Baby Bison. I am totally pumped, I feel really strong and am getting stronger. I cant wait to perform.

I saw the White Stripes in concert in Toronto a few weeks ago. Those of you who dont know what I'm talking about need to go to your nearest record store and buy a copy of 'de stijl' and 'get behind me satan' at the very least, if you have enough money buy all the cd's you can get your hands on and play them over and over again until you actually live in the white stripes world (I'm there man.) You wont want to ever stop. Trust me. Its the salvation of rock and roll. Listen to it.

My dogs got fleas. It was a horrible three day ordeal, but it is all over now. If only the nightmares of fleas attacking me would stop. Hopefully they are nightmares, and not actual fleas biting me, because that would mean that the ordeal has not acutally stopped at all.

I have -$18 in my checking account right now, partly due to the fact that I purchased 2 $30 dollar shirts at the white stripes show and got charged a bank fee for the canadian/american exchange that I wasnt expecting what bounced each and every purchase after that one... damn it. Oh well not much I can do now. Fuck the Bank, fuck the b-b-b-b-b-b-bank.

2005-07-30T16:18:00.000-04:00

I think I may have found a house!!!!! It is a Double so I will have rental income. Each unit has 3 bedrooms and a sun room and a fire place and hardwood floors and it is wonderful. It has a good sized yard and it is in a nice area. I can't fucking believe it! It is also right near JULY'S house. How odd that we both found new houses so close together-- best friends and great minds and fate and er yeah I'm pretty excited. The commute to work will be a bit longer but whatever I don't care...

2005-07-28T00:45:00.000-04:00

2005-07-28T00:43:00.000-04:00

2005-07-22T23:10:00.000-04:00

2005-07-13T21:11:00.000-04:00

2005-07-07T16:36:00.000-04:00

2005-07-06T19:26:00.000-04:00

2005-07-01T18:40:00.000-04:00

It has definately been a while since I last posted so if you are reading this thanks for still checking for updates.

I am doing stand-up at the comix cafe on wednesday if anyone is interested. Please come, please clap and cheer. I go on right before Karoke so er, you cant miss me... I hope I can write some funny jokes by then. I think the show is at like 7 or 8 or something. I guess I have a couple of days to figure it out. There is a guy I kind of like who I have been doing this crazy starbucks mating dance with for the past 4 or 5 years who will be there, so I have to really bring down the house. I also need a killer outfit, I am not sure which will be more difficult to come by. When I met this guy I thought, hmm I bet I'll end up marrying this kid That was years ago, so I guess I should probably give him a chance and start dating him, or at least think about returning his calls. I hate dating though. It is so structured. I like being the master of my own time and you just aren't when you are with someone. If I remember correctly he has a relatively large dong so maybe that will make up for it.

I am really hungry right now but I dont have any food. Oh well it would take me at least a month to starve to death wouldn't it?

It is the 4th of July weekend and boy am I excited. This is my FAVORITE holiday. Some of my fondest childhood memories take place in my neighbors yard on July 4th just eating hot dogs and watching home made fire works displays all over the neighborhood, never mind that fireworks are illegal in NY. I dont have any set in stone plans as of yet for this year, but I'm sure it will all shape up and I cant wait.

2005-06-03T16:47:00.000-04:00

. Just replace the URL here with the actual URL of your image.

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T18:23:00.000-04:00

2005-06-01T17:50:00.000-04:00

Hi stoners! Yesterday I finally did it. That's right-- I got my first tattoo. It isn't anything huge that I can brag about really, but still I'm proud of it. It is simple but it is very me. I really thought it would have hurt much more than it actually did, but then again I love pain so maybe it did hurt-- but I was concentrating on not having an orgasm in the chair pictured below -- in front of July and Jay the tattoo guy so uh, I digress, and yes this is a run-on sentence but I'm high so fuck it. That may be too much information, but I refuse to hold back with my stoners. The most unbelievable thing about the whole ordeal, other than that it wasn't planned, is that they were playing my fucking favorite song while I was getting inked. Sisters of Mercey MOTHER RUSSIA was on the cd player while my third star was getting done. How fucking poetic is that? Let me say, simple though it may be, this tattoo's meaning is pretty sincere. I'm gonna get a little sentimental here and describe why I got what I got... You can see the tat pictured above this post... Five black stars. Each represents to me something really important to me that I could not live without: Weed, Sex, Weed, Coffee, and Drugs. No No NO... I'm joking, merely joking. The stars actually represent my deep and sincere love for my bitches. Who is my bitches? You know who you is.

On second thought I have to talk to my bithces. Ho's I miss you. I know I'm probablly gonna get stomped for this in the 'press' but every one of us (except me of course) is acting really insincere and immature right now and we need to cut the shit and get back together. I thought about getting only three stars for me and my two sisters, but really I have four sisters and although we havn't hung out all togheher in a year and although I didnt know how much I was missing until I contemplated getting an appreviated tattoo, I do miss nights out on the porch on barton street or in the back yard or god, at parkdale or hartman or plymouth or roycroft or fucking delaware park at 5 miles per hour 5 blunts to the wind. Fuck Jason. 20 years is a long time and I once read a line in a home made birthday card that brought tears to my eyes which said we 'had a bond so strong that could never be broken' and it is time to get back to what we know, eachother. Sure wrongs have been done and feelings have been hurt but can we really do this forever. I do not in any way shape or form mean to say that people's opinions or hurt feelings are not valid because believe me, I UNDERSTAND. But face it, you always get the maddest at the people you love the most intensely. Have you had (honestly now...) very much fun without being all together? I haven't. We cant let this era pass us by acting like it never happened. People need to get what they need to say out on the table and see if we cant find some common ground. We dont have to smoke together to hang out, we weren't smoking or dating or drinking when we were wearing matching black blazers calling ourselves the 'mondo buddies' and we dont have to do that now. I have tryed to stay out of all of this but I just cant. I realized that even if no one is officially mad at me I have really lost something with everyone fighting. It can still be like it was before we just have to get over our egos and rember we love eachother. Think to yourself about our backstreet boys song, if you dont get a tear in your eye over the silent line in remembrance of christina you really have lost your heart... SO now, hopefully noone is mad at me but if you are you arent who I thought you were... I give you all a lot of credit, you have done great things with your lives but there is something huge missing. There is a huge hole in my live (all of our lives)where the stoners used to be (admit it!) Lets have a barbeque, PLEASE!

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:37:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:36:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:35:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:34:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:33:00.001-04:00

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:33:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2005-06-01T17:32:00.000-04:00

2005-05-03T20:48:00.000-04:00

2005-04-30T21:55:00.000-04:00

2005-04-30T14:12:00.000-04:00

2005-04-30T14:11:00.000-04:00

2005-04-21T15:11:00.000-04:00

SO This is the 4-20 story. Mine anyway. I had to work 8-4 which kind of sucks cause I like to spend this HIGH HOLY HOLIDAY stoned from wake to drool... but anyway, i digress. Of course I wasn't thinking much about smoking all day, making frappuccino's till my head spun as fast as the blender blades, but I remembered when Baby Bison, Ryonce and Birdman all came in high as hell to get some drinks. It must have been about 3pm. They were very high and anxious for me to get off of work so we could get smoke together. I was still in some work-mode-other-world so I had no idea what was going on... they were rushing me like crazy. I punched out at 4:02 and went to the bathroom. Bison stormed the bathroom after 3 minutes asking if I was done yet. I was like damn calm down. I got into the car and realized that they were rushing me so we could share an all holy 4:20 blunt. I am such a fucking stoner how could I forget 4:20 on 4/20? I got an instant giddy feeling. In 2 minutes flat Ryonce rolled us a blunt, and then we realized we had no lighter. It took 4 tries, but we lit it with the car cigarette lighter and off we went. We began right as the clock hit 420 and was it sweet.

2005-04-15T21:13:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow I think I am going to get up early and take my dog for a walk down by the water. The weather has been so nice lately that my mood has been great. Buffalo hasn't had a spring in years. I know for those of you that live out of town this doesnt sound possible but seriously, it will be snowing one week (unil the end of may mind you) and 75 degrees the next. Last year we barely had a summer. It rained at least 4 times a week and almost never reached 65 degrees. It was cold and horrible. I hope this doesnt happen this year.

2005-04-12T21:01:00.000-04:00

The great weed drought of 2000 will go down in history of one of the saddest times Buffalo's West Side has ever seen. Before big elections all the big guys in local government and law enforcement start cracking down on drug activity in the area. This particular year they did a very good job 'cleaning up the streets' and we couldn't find weed anywhere for about a month. NO ONE COULD GET US WEED! We were desperate. I called people from work who I wasn't sure even smoked anymore-- to see if they could get me some. My 50-year-old-friend Beva's nephew sold weed. I stalked them both to no avail. They swore there was just no green to be found anywhere. We searched pockets of old jeans and winter coats and drawers and highschool back pacs and under the bed and all over the neighborhood but we still couldn't get our hands on any weed. Everyone got busted or had decided to lay low because they were just catching people left and right. (LUCKILY they don't enforce the laws like this all the time...) It was insane. We got really, really drunk instead but it just isnt the same.

2005-04-09T13:24:00.000-04:00

Apparently I am only posting once a week now... Nothing cool has happened, that I really mention. I think that today I might be driving with bison and bird man (or bird poop if you are jesticle) up to dinosaur barbeque in Syracuse but really that doesnt sound like much fun but I will probably go anyway. I was going to get a pedicure today but I dont really feel like shaving my legs so I might as well go and watch them eat some ribs or something. Let me remind the world that barbeque is not on the Atkins diet. Anyway I think it is time to go now.

2005-04-02T19:14:00.000-05:00

For the record, I am smoking weed again. Sobriety is boring in the winter in Buffalo... maybe I'll wait till summer. I am an addict!

The pope died. I am pretty sad about it which is really suprising to me. I have never felt too much for him either way, I didnt love or hate him. Now however I have a lot of compassion for him and I feel really sad that he has died. Catholics believe that he is the representation of GOD on earth. I could never really grasp that so I could never really identify with the holy father, but now I feel for him, I really do. I cried 2 times watching CNN today, and it really freaked out my dogs. Twinkie kept jumping all over my head and theodore was howeling and whining. The pope's main message to the world over these past 26 years of his 'rule' was BE NOT AFRAID. I think that this is an amazing message. Do what you know you must do, and do it boldly, that is what I think that means. I have always lived my life with that in mind, but I never knew it was the popes main message. Maybe I should have paid more attention to him. I think religion is really important. It doesn't matter to me what people believe, but I really think that spirituality in ones life is essential to happiness.

2005-04-02T17:11:00.000-05:00

2005-04-02T17:09:00.000-05:00

2005-03-23T16:22:00.000-05:00

So I am currently in day 4 of sobriety. I literally smoke weed everyday so this is quite the feat for me. Not that I'm addicted because supposedly you cant become addicted but I think that I am definately a weedaholic. (no there is no such thing as weedahol) I love the fuck out of ganja. The best and worst thing about weed is that it makes you forget shit. So right now I am really jonsing for something, but I cant really remember what so I'm sitting in front of the computer with my credit card buying flowers for people thinking that shopping will fill the little space that thc smoke usually fills up...Not in my lungs of course, but in my... heart? I am not sure it is working but I think my head is a little less hazy than it usually is. Not that I am quitting. Oh no not to worry west side drug dealers, your best customer is still alive and well, I am just detoxing so I can be smart enough to go to this interview I have in a few weeks. How could I be a stoner comedian and no longer be a stoner. Maybe I am just kidding my self, maybe no druggie could be successful, but then again maybe they could. If I think though I can name a few people who used to be stoners and are now famous... Dave Chapelle, Andre 3000, and I'm sure I know of more but, well, I cant remember right now. Ask me again on friday and maybe that part of my memory will be unlocked. Right now my brain is like one of those video games where you have to do something cool before you can use the really good characteristics of the game-- like win a race before you can customize your car or something... I have to stop smoking so much so I can use the altered state to my advantage. Weed saved my life and my sanity so I'll always love it. I think. Although the last time I looked it was,-- oh May of 2000 and I was 21. Well, they say time flies when you are having fun and they are right. One thing that sucks about not smoking is that when I dont I realize how much I hate my job. Not that I go to work high but I am usually hazy and indifferent enough not to mind the snivering fools I serve. But soon I'll have a real job, hopefully. And soon after that I am going to take over the world with Baby Bison

2005-03-15T21:06:00.000-05:00

2005-03-14T14:19:00.000-05:00

so if you would like to see pictures instead of fucked up HTML, go to anyonebutW.blogspot.com. I accidentally put the pics on that page and moving them with out the Sprint ads that are attached is proving harder than I thought. Have fun.

2005-03-14T11:14:00.000-05:00

src="http://pictures.sprintpcs.com/shareImage/29739578370_235.jpg?border=1,255,255,255,1,0,0,0&invite=hEdP2p8U5852OamU78SL" border="0" alt ="Paul sees dead people?"/>

2005-03-11T21:33:00.000-05:00

2005-03-04T20:00:00.000-05:00

Ah well I have been back in Buffalo for a week now and this is the first day I have not had to work, so here I sit. I got an ipod today. I almost just spelled that 'I Pod' but I remembered how uncool the capital I would be. Baby Bison got one too. I dont know what I was thinking getting something that costs like, $4oo dollars when I have less than that in my savings account right now, but I really feel like things are going to start happening for me soon. 'Happening' meaning, I will soon get a job where I dont have to use sharpies to write in code on paper cups and yell 'TALL LATTE' all day, and take orders from acne-prone suburban kids with $100 dollar bills. No I didnt buy the U2 ipod... how did I end up spending $400 dollarz? I got a voice recorder for it and a car kit and the protection plan. Oh well. Now I have to try and not forget it in my unlocked car. Try and steal this crackheads. 5000 songs is a looooot!

2005-02-19T12:24:00.000-05:00

I'm going to New Orleans today! Yesterday I went on the San Antonio River on a little boat tour of the River Walk. That was fun, although when your are from Western New York you think of the Niagara River as a river and when you see other ones you wonder where the rest of it is. The Niagara is like a mile across, the San Antonio is like 30 feet at the widest, atleast that I saw. I can't imaging taking a little tour boat down the Niagara River... I mean it would be safe for say, 3 minutes and then woosh-- down the falls you go. While we were on the river walk July's niece was holding my package of gifts I bought for people and the handles broke and it crashed to the ground. It was full of glass. I felt the bag and I could tell stuff was broken inside. I was pissed but not at the kid, I mean the bag broke she didn't toss it or anything. When we went inside I started looking to see if anything could be salvaged I saw that nothing was broken except a Texas lighter that I got for $1.99. I couldnt beleive it!

2005-02-17T19:14:00.000-05:00

Well it looks like my singing turned everyone off to my blog as I have not had any hits in days!! Oh well fuck you guys... I'm writing from San Antonio Texas where I'm visiting July, my bestest friend. She has like 9 dogs so I dont even really miss mine... I feel kinda bad about that but hell it is a vacation. Ok she only really has 3 dogs and 5 puppies that she is going to be selling soon. Pretty soon I am going to the Alamo. At least I hope I 'm going to the Alamo, since it is the only thing I wanted to do while I was here other than sit around and relax and shop and eat and play with puppies. There is a cheese cake factory in the local mall, need I say more?

2005-02-13T22:48:00.000-05:00

I have to appologize for the singing posts, I was high and what is worse I didn't warm up my voice at all and I had a cold and, oh wait yeah, I cant sing. sorry. But it is funny you have to admit that.

2005-02-11T23:07:00.000-05:00

2005-02-11T23:05:00.000-05:00

2005-02-11T22:41:00.000-05:00

2005-02-06T16:33:00.000-05:00

I am currently really, really sick. The other day this asian woman whom I adore came into the store and when I said that she hadnt been in in a while, she mentioned that she had had the flu since December. She said she was feeling about 85%. In case you were wondering, I am positive that this woman has given me bird flu. Call me whatever you want, i know it isnt nice of me to accuse her just because she is asian but I am SURE I have it. I could smell the sick on her still. Dont get me wrong I dont blame her but... What am I supposed to say to her the next time she comes in "Hey--, over here in the states we dont go back to work unless we have been 100% for at least a day or two, even if it is just us and our husband running the resturaunt...well anyway, thanks for the bird flu, here is your coffee. Fuck I hate feeling sick. Hopefully I wont be sick until Easter... Well maybe it is just a cold.

2005-02-03T19:36:00.000-05:00

I am going to Texas. Anyone want anything?

2005-02-02T18:12:00.000-05:00

I recently posted this very blurb as a comment on Stoner Diary. I love looking back on this story (god knows why) so I thought I'd post it here too.

On my 25th Birthday we rented a hotel room so we wouldnt have to clean up after the party. It started out crazy- rowdy, complete with the sticki-iki-ike, some hash, chineese food and my closest friends. It however, quickly, turned into something entirely different. My friend decided to invite his crack head/dealing brother to the party for some reason and he came-- with his duffle bag full of crack, calling all his friends telling them where the party was. When my sister (Baby Bison) informed him that it was a private party and asked him to leave he called her a rasist and threatened to shoot us...All I remember is my 19 year old sister brawling in a very nice down town buffalo hotel hallway while i was hitting a gas mask bong...and I didn't even perk up until I heard the words 'shoot all you mutherfuckers' to which I yanked off the mask and in unison we all picked up all the illegal shit we had in the room and tore off down the emergency stairs... as if to say, Happy Birthday Angelator.

Oh and for the record, I have never smoked crack, but I have been in the presence of lots of crack smokers. I even met a crack whore once. One week back in 2000 or 2001 I was a coke head, but that stuff is pretty expensive and it gives you energy and what the fuck do I want with energy? I did some lines off Ryonce's highschool text book and just started standing up and sitting down over and over again until I took a few bong hits and then my mind was racing and I wanted to keep standing up and sitting down but I was stoned and thus too tired. I kept wondering if it was really coke we were snorting.

2005-01-29T16:05:00.000-05:00

2005-01-28T15:04:00.000-05:00

2005-01-26T21:07:00.000-05:00

I exercized some stock options today. I feel all corporate and responsible and rich... but really I am none of those things.

I need change in my life... like the kind you can roll and buy things with mostly.

I think i may be getting sick and that sucks. This girl Tonee and I at starbucks always get eachother sick... it is like we have similar immune systems or something, and recently she was really sick so, basically I think I might be dying soon.

I hate when someone tells me they are sad and thre is nothing I can do about it.

This is a lame post but that is all you are getting... for now.

2005-01-20T17:38:00.000-05:00

So how does everyone feel about the audio blogger? I like it because it means I can take my readers and turn them into listeners. Now anyone who reads my blog can go anywhere my cellphone can go, talk about flexability. Any suggestions on what you would like to hear me do (no I will not shit or cum on this site... )Well, maybe if you asked nicely i'd cum... can you imagine me holding the cellphone in one hand and some random mans hair in the other cuming into the phone. Am I getting too old for random lays? I am not sure I want to know the answer to that. One day I'm going to give someone my real phone number and then we will probably end up getting married... but I digress. How would you all like to hear me sing in the shower...?

I went to the dentist today. I hauled my stoner ass out of bed at 8:06 am and got there on time at 9am. Unbelievable, especially since I opened the day before and had no sleep for 2 nights in a row. I was supposed to go to the dentist and then to the eye doctor at 11:00. It shouldnt have been too much of a problem except they didnt take me into the office for like 45 minutes. At one point the nurse, or whatever she is, said 'oh noone has taken you yet?' and still I sat there for like 15 minutes. Then they put me in a room and left me sitting in the recliner thingy for another half hour. I fell asleep. Finally 4 hours later I got to leave with my teeth cleaned and a flouride treatment. I have to go back next week for a filling. I cant believe it took them a half a day to basically high-tech-style, brush me teeth. My teeth and gums now kinda hurt... ok they really hurt. The thing is, I love it. I keep biting down to make it worse. I absoutely love gum pain. No one understands why, least of all me. The man was in there scratching the shiznik out of my gums and at one point said 'are you ok' because I wasnt wincing or squirming...I thought, dude if you only knew how much I was enjoying this you would be resting your dick on my shoulder right now. Just to be completely honest and so I leave no one guessing, I do not, for the record, like sexual pain, just gum pain. I like inflicting sexual pain now and then but that is another story. Since my sisters and co workers read this blog, I will leave it at that. I'm just saying that if anyone (of the male persuasion) likes the occasional watermelon rammed up their hind end they can give me a call. If you are still reading I want you to remember that I am a comedian and you can never really know what I might say or do and that it is that attribute that most makes me worth knowing.

2005-01-19T14:59:00.000-05:00

2005-01-19T05:52:00.000-05:00

2005-01-18T17:52:00.000-05:00

2005-01-15T21:57:00.000-05:00

I was gonna clean my room, but then I got high- words by afroman, sentiment understood by all but the most diligent of stoners--angelator

About 1 year and 1 month ago I began cleaning my room. I piled everything onto my bed and then got kinda sick of cleaning and left it for like 7 months. I then went in and moved some stuff around and threw some stuff out. Fast foreward to Today... I can finally see the floor in some spots and i could definately get to my bed if I wanted to... Once I stopped sleeping in there it became a room to toss things into and it got really bad. I have like 43000 pillows. I dont know why i would have so many... I have nowhere to put them. I also have a lot of college books that I really dont need. What the hell should I do with them? I graduated in 2000, so noone is going to be able to use them now...fuck.

2005-01-14T18:42:00.000-05:00

I was just blogging and hit save as draft so that I could help ryan put some links on his page and damn it all to hell but my shit is just gone. I hate when that happens. Oh well, maybe it is all for the better.

2005-01-12T01:19:00.000-05:00

Whatever you do... dont forget to ask Bision about her road test. Woa I didnt know I could change the Font. Did you know that wah sing has the best chinese food in the business? I read so on their complimentary calender. I agree. I love it there. Although last time I ordered from there they left my food out of the bag and everyone else got to eat chinese and I did not. When we called to complain they didnt believe us. Fuckers. It could be because Bison and Birdman didnt notice my food wasnt in the bag for like 3 hours. It could be because Bison and Birdman ate my food and got rid of the evidence.

Starbucks has a new drink. It is tasty but you will shit your pants if you try it. It is pure chocolate and has 6 grams of fibre in 6 ounces or something. Great now even more assholes are going to blow up our toilets. Get it, assholes. Har har.

2005-01-05T14:23:00.000-05:00

oh i was going to blogg but I think that bobcat is here, we are going to lunch, talk to yall later

2005-01-01T23:05:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year All! Hope everyone had a wonderful night last night. I did. I suppose. I was wasted and that is what is important.

Borzillieri Grandchildren take notice, a terrible thing happened! Grandma was vaccuuming and accidentally broke her Venus de Milo bust. She is horrified, she almost cried when she told the story. It was her mothers and she really loved it. I have very fond memories of that statue I have always thought it was wonderful. And I am of course pretty sure we al remember it because it was naked and we were all stunned that our grandmother could possibly have a boobie statue.

A Picture Share!

2004-12-26T22:08:00.000-05:00

A Picture Share!

2004-12-26T17:35:00.000-05:00

2004-12-26T13:16:00.000-05:00

Wow it has been almost a month since my last post. Sorry about that (to anyone still bothering to check...) Lots has been going on so let me update you. I just heated up a cup of coffee from yesterday so I'm all ready to talk to you all now. (the starbucks gods are cringing)

First of all let me say Merry Christmas. I hope everyone spent theirs in a fashion similar to my own, smoking a blunt singing old school rap karaoke-style with Bobcat, Birdman and Bison. It was nice to all be stoned together again, like old times. It sucks that we have to grow up, and not smoke daily anymore... I mean I have not reached that point yet of course but some of us have. And for the record, things just aint the same since youve been gone Wench (can I still say wench?) (I'm hearing Wierd Al singing 'since youve been gone, its like chewing on tin foil...hmm where did that come from?) I got a table for Christmas. Now when I buy my house I'll have a table and a laptop and a few dishes and a lot of coffee to stock inside it. Oh and dog crates, dont forget dog crates and hair products. But the table is nice. I might have hurt birdmans feelings though because he wanted to put it together and I said no because I wanted to stain it first...I just didnt want him to have to go throught the trouble twice...

A few days ago I got a call from my father asking for a ride. Anyone who has met my dad is already laughing/cringing. He was a bit out of it, as usual (think Ozzy Osbourne on methadone with no Sharon, no money, no small dogs and a lot more mumbo jumbo mumbeling.) I said I had to work (a lie) and he said it was pretty important. I said OK. I called my mom and she was like 'oh yeah he said something about getting a ride to rehab this week sometime, make sure you get the keys to his apartment.' I was like What The Fuck? If you were asing your daughter for a ride to rehab would you not maybe mention in on the phone...first. Anyway I made my mom come with me, and she was not too pleased to be there either but she has the knack of being damn nasty with a frosting of nice so it doesnt sound mean till you think about it, so she was a necessary addition to the car ride to ECMC. During said ride he made me park in a bus stop so he could unload and the bus almost tore off my door and my dad went all 70's gangster on the driver saying things like 'thanks man' all sarcastically. I was amused until I realized that the last time he checked (ie the last time he lead a sober life) that was the socially acceptable way to address the situation 'hey man, I'm a hippie man, dont run my door over friend, smoke with us instead dude...' and when that didnt work he went seventies ape on him, 'fuck you friend, are you happy running me man?' Not cool. Oh and also, he was drunk... he was worried they wouldn't take him otherwise, I dont think there is any question whether they would have taken him mkay? So I am guessing that he spent his christmas in a hoodie and tube socks sitting in a circle with 12 other 'heavy drinkers' wondering what went wrong. Please Gd save me from this fate. I am still wondering why I gave him my phone number when I answered the phone at my grandmothers house on Thanksgiving expecting it to be her sister. I should maybe have pretended to be the answering machine like usual, but I digress.

Beep, beep, beep, beep this just in... It is the day after christmas and Apollo, Mr. Squeekers, Theodore and Twinkie are alone with me in the house. Apollo being Birdmans 80 lb dog that doesnt usually come over but was here because it was christmas. So while I was blogging, I heard a thump. Luckily I checked it out. Apollo had pushed open the kitchen door and knocked over the garbage looking for food. When he didnt find any there he checked the fridge. I dont know how he got in there,but all I have to say is that he likes Aunt Kristin's ranch bread bowl dip and basket cheese. Oh and Mr. Squeekers shit under the dining room table, probably because he couldnt have any cheese. I should have known this would happen. I was still asleep on the love seat (where i have slept since April? May?) when Bison and Birdman left,and had to rise and chase the dogs out of my mothers house (down stairs) because not only did Apollo open the kitchen door, but his 'dad' or 'step mom' (bison is the step mom of a dog... he he) left the fucking door open that leads to the hall and ultimately outside. Luckily that door was closed since, was wearing nothing but flannel pj's with a hole so big in the crotch that I'm even embarassed to wear them when home alone... and socks. Could you just imagine me in my unbrushed hair flashing my nonnie to all the people on their way into church across the street in 12 inches of snow chasing 3 small, and one giant dog with out my glasses on, the day after christmas. I would have make the newspaper, I know it. I knew I should have gone to brunch with them afterall.

2004-11-23T18:19:00.000-05:00

ok everyone go to this website:

http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=12252360

Check out this great site that is giving away totally free iPods! I've joined and I think you should as well. It's a completely legitimate offer, and this company has already given away $4 million in free stuff!

All you have to do is join, complete and online offer, and refer friends to do the same. That's it!

Here is my referral link. To help me get my iPod, click this exact link to join, or copy and paste it into a browser: http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=12252360

AII I had to do was sign up for a bIockbuster free two week triaI there are other things you can try too, come on friends, heIp me out!

A Picture Share!

2004-11-13T14:05:00.000-05:00

2004-11-13T14:04:00.000-05:00

So bison, birdman and angelator are aII going to Washington DC on the 20th of Jan to watch them swear in our new mother fucker-- i mean our new president Anyone who wouId Iike to come with us need onIy repIy and chip in for gas and an oiI change for birdman and a cheap hoteI for a night or two This aII goes down on a thursday, so we'II most IikeIy Ieave on wednesday morning and come home friday afternoon the drive is not that Iong and you know we'II have a bIast HopefuIIy none of us wiII get arrested I saw some rooms at an extended stay *WHICH has a stove and stuff* for around $100/ night so if there were 4 peope it wouId be onIy $50 for the room, bring some ramen and some granoIa bars and the whoIe trip wont cost too much more than 150 doIIars Iet me know if you wanna go!

2004-11-03T20:02:00.001-05:00

I cant fucking beIieve it but BUSH won the damn eIection I cant imagine what kind of horribIe things are going to befaII this country now I hate to sound Iike a 7th day adventist but this couId be the beginning of the end, at Ieast of things as we know them Bush is trying to force his born again vaIues on a country that was forged on reIigious freedom By appointing justices to the supreme court with who identify with his biased and singuIar view on what is right for 'Amerika' He wants to roII back Roe vs Wade, outIaw gay marriage with a constitutionaI ammendment, and continue to dupe AMERICANS into thinking that they are safer we are occupying Iraq for no obvious reason Wake up and smeII the constitution burning peopIe, George Washington is roIIing over in his grave I wanted to write more but I have no stamina because I was up aII night in tears! Save America, watch cIoseIy and do aII you can!

2004-11-02T17:07:00.000-05:00

So today we vote, dont forget and dont switch the wrong switch-- I aImost voted for Nader puIIing down the wrong switch, thank god I came to my senses and Iooked again-

A Picture Share!

2004-10-26T10:54:00.001-04:00

A Picture Share!

2004-10-26T10:54:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2004-10-26T10:52:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2004-10-23T20:43:00.000-04:00

A Picture Share!

2004-10-23T20:40:00.000-04:00

2004-10-20T20:43:00.000-04:00

the other day I got fried chicken at the RoyaI and after eating a smaII piece or two I bit into the breast onIy to find it icy and raw- I aImost screamed right there in the booth- any other eating out horror stories?

A Picture Share!

2004-10-18T20:22:00.000-04:00

2004-10-10T23:22:00.000-04:00

So tomorrow I'm going to somewhere in the woods in the middIe of PA to interview for a position as a counseIor in a home for 'bad boys,' no seriousIy the home is in the woods so the kids cant get awaytoo easiIy I am kinda scared because when I asked if there was a hoteI nearby that I couId stay in, the HR man said oh yeah sure it's not deer hunting season so noone wiII need to stay in any hoteI-- dear god

i think I may have dropped some ibuprofin in my Iiving room the other day I am totaIIy terrified that one of the dogs is going to find it and eat it Ibu is deadIy for dogs and everytime i see them Iick their Iips I think, 'oh god they've found a piII, ate it and wiII soon die' I cant take this

I wouId say 'wish me Iuck,' but I dont know if I want to Iive in the woods

A Picture Share!

2004-10-01T13:44:00.000-04:00

Dippin dots

A Picture Share!

2004-09-30T17:11:00.000-04:00

2004-09-23T18:53:00.000-04:00

Karaoke Night

[I got an emai that read"} Karaoke Night is every Wednesday night, with the bar opening at 8:00pm and the singing starting at 10:00pm. This is going so well we are thinking of adding another karaoke night. Come see what all the hubbub is about Wednesday nights at The Comix Cafe!

Any takers? aw come on!

I had an interview yesterday, the job sounds good, think I'd enjoy it, wish me luck-